Sometimes I find it so hard to tell the truth.
Tak baik mengaibkan orang, but still I've spill the beans to several people close to me. Because it was too personal and too un-professional to talk bad about people, even when it's the truth. Don't make controversy, avoid 'em as much as you can. Bersabarlah, kerana itu lebih baik. I can console myself and be robotic again to face the coming days but I can't convince Mama anymore. She immediately get into her protective mode when I propose I'd continue. I'm torn. I'm torn apart. And I can't blame her because there's no mum in the world that would like to see her child being bullied, especially me-lah kan. *dush*

If only I have a piece of land I could grow all kinds of crops and harvest and sell it to the market and I'd leave this place.

If only I can get married now so I have a strong excuse to quit and become a housewife.

If only I'm robotic enough to stay

If only I think less about equality

Ya Allah help me to find the best way...