Last wish

*intended to be published yesterday's evening but postponed due to unexpected circumstances*

Sometimes it's the togetherness that I want.
Okay, I know this may sounds kind of selfish but I want us to walk together, see things together. I want to be with you. But when I do and I plead for us to go together, you wouldn't want anymore. I miss our old times, but at the same time I am aware that you might not have that spirit anymore. I understand that you have grown old, and that gave me a whole lot more reason to try not to force you or sulk badly when you don't wish to do anything with me.

But sometimes, sometimes the frustration in me might be stronger than my awareness of the situation, and the feeling is prone to show itself even when I say:

"It's okay, I just wanna go there and walk with you, if you don't feel like it than we don't have to go."

:[

Sometimes, in fact many a time, I just hope that my feelings won't show so that you wouldn't have to worry, so that you wouldn't notice how disappointed I am that might cause you to feel guilty, but each time I tried it will still show even the tiniest bit.

I'm sorry Ma, I wished I could stop making you worried. The bad thing is, inevitably, I still do.