[PART 2] I screwed up

After several days, to be precise, after 8 days, I don't find this all too bad.
But still, it eats the edge of my heart. I don't know why.
Maybe because I still have the fear of failure.
I don't have that 'Dare to Fail' attitude.
Hurm...why do I complain about this too much?
It has been fated this way, my raft is already moving towards the one way canal.
And yeah, it's moving, and I have no power to turn back.
After all, if I decide to turn back, then THAT IS the major failure.
So...I'll stay and strive.
Although I don't know whether all this will be significant.
As if I want to pursue any career in this.
Yeah, not even thinking to do something.
I just want to be a housewife.
Of course I would have to work as long as I'm single
But...yeah, it's just like that.

It's not a harm to learn right?
Maybe this whole period will make me fall in love with this a little bit more. Hopefully
Like the saying goes if you don't know you won't love it (tak kenal maka tak cinta)
But, love...it's not something so easy to get and to feel.
You can give love even without feeling but it just shows how robotic you are, err ehem...I am.
I just hope that I can do this. I can manipulate the fearful situation and turn it into a better one.
I just hope Allah gives me enough strength to do the best and get through all this.
I am afraid, really.
I want to perform, and I have to perform.
I want to learn as much as I can, and be able to do as much as I'm able to.
I don't want to screw anything up again...